Why Us?
by sesshouchan55
Summary: When there's no answer to Whys because fate itself doesn't know the answers.


**AN: The theme might be uncomfortable so err...read at own risk. lllOrz**

 **You know the warnings. XD Not beta'ed so grammatical errors ahead. Please bear with me. *sob***

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Akihito kept asking 'Why?' but two weeks had passed and still he couldn't find his answer. Two weeks. Fourteen days. Fourteen days of agony and pain. Hell. Torture. Emptiness.

He's empty. The once lively and cheerful Akihito was now empty. Literally. The three-month baby he had been carrying was forcefully removed from him making him at lost. Suddenly lost to everything. He didn't know what went wrong. Or why did it happened. What he did wrong. And yet, he couldn't find the answers.

Akihito could not help but blame himself, it was his body after all. It was him who had been carrying the baby and yet he lost it. They were doing great, so why? Asami gave his best support for their child and it was going well. Really doing well. They had the best doctors lined up for them. The best care they could gather.

"Just what the hell went wrong?"

He cried asking the same question for two weeks. Even Asami could not answer him. Even the walking encyclopedia, Kirishima, could not even look at him and answer him. Akihito was beyond depressed and they could do nothing to ease it.

They were both happy but careful when they find out that Akihito was pregnant with their first child. Akihito could feel the heartbeat of their child for three months. It was new to him but it was soothing to know that there was life inside him. Asami was even excited about it and he could see it on his husband's eyes. There was so much love that Akihito couldn't ask for more. Three months of bliss that suddenly got snatched away from them.

'So why?' He asked again.

'Why me? Why us? Why our child?'

It was one day when he was just cooking for lunch when he felt something between his thighs. It was warm and sticky... and red. He did not do anything that could stress him and his child, so why? What really went wrong?

The doctors could not explain it either. Akihito and their baby was healthy an hour ago but suddenly, the heartbeat stopped. Gone. Quiet. Silence.

Akihito was finally awake from the operation and was lying on the hospital bed, silently crying for the sudden lost of the child they created with love. The emptiness on his stomach was something he can't even explain. The pain and lost, the sadness.

"Asami... I'm sorry..." He kept on saying as his husband continued to soothe him. Asami kept on saying it was not his fault. It was nobody's fault but Akihito knew better.

It was his body and it was his fault.

One month had passed and everything went to normal. Nearly.

The morning greetings were gone. The sweet talks and flirting at the kitchen were just a distant memory now. The lively dining area was now just a place for them to eat. The only place for them to have a face to face. The only place for them to have a proper look at each other.

Asami tried his best to bring back the fire in his Akihito. He really did. He asked him out more often, please him more than he used to yet Akihito's fire eventually died. His lover shut him out that they were no longer what they used to be. He even avoided him to the extent that there were longer hugs and kisses as they lay beside each other at night. The bed that was full of warmth and happiness was just now a room they could sleep. A nothing but a dull and empty closet.

Empty. Silent and cold.

Lonely and depressed.

The home they both slowly built through the hardships they had turned into nothing but a house. Ceilings, walls but there were no longer laughs that they both love to have. Everyone loved to hear. Gone.

Two months and they were no longer talking. Asami never gave up though, tired, but he never gave in. He kept on building Akihito up even though he knew it was useless anymore. He even asked for an outside help, brought specialist to help Akihito, but he was no longer responding. Akihito became a doll, empty and lifeless.

Asami was asking for any reaction, anything that could give him a sign that his Akihito was still there. Every day, he asked, whoever or whatever out there. He was desperate. And one day, fate answered him but it was not the way he was asking for.

He came early one day when he suddenly felt wrong. Something was wrong and he would not just ignore it. He was thankful that he did, went home - halfheartedly.

Asami was used to the quietness of their 'home' but, this time, he got chills. Asami found Akihito on the shower room, staring blankly at the knife on his hand as he let the water run down. He rushed to his side, pulling away the sharp thing that if he was just a minute late, he could see his lover cutting his own wrist. He pulled Akihito for a hug, to bring back the warmth that was lost due to the cold water.

"Come back, Akihito. Please..." Asami begged, called and begged even more. He tried and tried until he felt Akihito sob. He felt him tremble under his touch. He felt him alive...once again.

They were both tired and desperate yet Asami knew that he could not afford to lose to pain now. Akihito needed him more than ever and he will never let him feel alone, not that he had, but with their situation it was given that Akihito felt it especially the sudden loss of their supposed to be first child.

Akihito pushed himself closer, clinging even, crying his heart out to the man who never gave him up, even if himself gave in to the emptiness and darkness he was having for two months.

"We'll get through this, Akihito," Asami said as he caressed his lover who broke down, two months after his miscarriage. "Together..."

Feeling Akihito nodding to him, he pulled him closer giving him an assurance that it will not be the end.

A promise that they gave each other that they will try and continue to face the upcoming hardships. A promise that was sealed with a perfect kiss. A kiss of brand new hope and tomorrow. A tomorrow of nothing but them, building their own family.

"AND CCCCUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTT!"

"That was superb! Perfect! Magnificent!"

"Shut it, Mikhail. You're too loud," Feilong tried to calm his director down but was failing. "You're hurting my head!"

Mikhail ignored his producer and continued to praise his wonderful actors.

Finally the last scene of the short film was done and they could now all have a well deserved rest.

Putting the country's number one businessman and his actor(retired) 'wife' in front of the camera was a miracle that the whole production did not even thought would happened.

The theme of the short film was about lovers who had lost their first child, which was too far from the real life couple. Because…

"Daddy!" Yelled by a seven-year old kid not far from the set. He came then running towards his father who had just finished changing.

"Daddy, you're so great! And you too dad!" He commented non-stop as he was lifted by his father.

"Am I now?" Asami asked giving his son a kiss on the cheek. "Were you good while we were gone?" He then asked.

"Yep!" The kid giggled as he pulled himself closer to his father.

Takato and Kou then came holding two three-year old kids. Identical twins - a girl and a boy.

"Dad!" Called by the little girl who was reaching her arms from Takato towards Akihito.

"How's my little girl?" The actor asked giving a kiss to his daughter.

"Sleepy, Dad."

"I couldn't bring her to sleep so I think that made her exhausted. Sorry Aki." Takato explained.

Akihito laughed a little saying it was all good to his best friend. "Sorry for the trouble also. We know that both of you are busy… "

"Nah, it's fine. Don't worry about it. The kids were good so there was no problem at all." Kou answered this time still holding Ayumu, as he was sleeping peacefully.

Before they realized it, Ayumi and Ryoichi, their first child, were fast asleep at their parent's arms indicating that they should have called it a day.

Asami and Akihito and the rest of the group made their way out as Mikhail and Feilong bid them goodbye. It was already a long day and the director and producer knew better than to keep most of their time.

"It's good to see that they finally made it," Feilong commented after sending the family out of the studio. "They really deserve it."

"Yeah. Who knows that will happen back then if Akihito did not came back," The Russian director said leaning to his own lover. "Who knows if we are even still alive if not."

Who really knows if Akihito did not respond to Asami back then? What would really happen?

The short film may be a product of extensive writing, screenplay and hours of production. To the rest of the world, it will be just a figment of fiction. A story written for the entertainment industry but to the people who were close enough to Asami Ryuichi and Takaba Akihito, it was their story. Their real life story

A story to remember that even the unanswerable questions in the time of being lost will eventually have the answers as long as there is hope and love around.

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 **AN: This topic may be sensitive to others and I apologize for that. *bow* I may not experienced it directly but I've lost siblings due to miscarriage back then when I was younger and seeing my mother in those times was not something I could describe.**

 **Anywaaaaaaays... Please don't hate me for the roller coaster feels. XD**

 **XOXO MINNA~~~ 'Till then. -sesshouchan**


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